When someone accuses us of not doing enough we feel terrible. Worse if we are doubting our own judgment and wonder, “Am I capable of more?”
This is a hard concept when we have a chronic illness. Our energy levels and pain threshold can change from day to day. Sometimes we doubt ourselves so much we get confused about what we are capable of doing which causes havoc in how we see ourselves in our various roles as partner, parent and productive member of society.
Defensiveness in the form retreating like a turtle or snarling back like a cornered rat, is human nature when we feel we are attacked. We can often feel attacked when we are flat on our back and our spouses or kids are pulling on us to do more.
When you know the truth about your limits there is less need to be defensive. When you have the truth in your corner it is easier to stay calm, accepting and centered in confidence.
OK, so how do we know our real limits?